Dysphoria

Ok, if you're not trans you probably don't even know what "dysphoria" is, so I'll clarify a bit. It is the terrible, dreadful feeling you get because of your body doesn't match your brain, your identity. Your brain basically just flips out because it sees the wrong sex characteristics it is "programmed" for. It can manifest itself in many ways, also detachment, which was my way of dealing with it years ago.

The moment I drew this, I felt extremely dysphoric. Even more so than normally, and I felt like being torn down on the inside, while having to smile-n-wave on the outside. I made this drawing to get that feeling 'out' and process it a bit better.
Even though over time I have gotten VERY good at drawing up walls and a mask to stop people from noticing, this is how I feel on the inside. I hide my own pain from others and even myself with jokes and laughter, but sometimes... I just can't hold it anymore, and paper always listens without prejudice.